Monday, February 7, 2011

Why I Blocked You

Reasons why I may have blocked your Twitter account:

1. You have the word "internet marketing" in your bio.
2. You followed me immediately after I tweeted a key word—yoga, restaurant, Heidi Klum, tarot or the worst of all, deal.
3. You're a realtor.
4. Your avatar is a pouty teenage girl, yet your tweets are all links promising to get me more followers or improve my golf swing.
5. I looked at your Following list and it's suspiciously random.
6. You're following 59,431 other people, or exactly 2,000.
7. When I click to see who you are, it says you follow 126 people. When I hit refresh, it jumps to 400.
8. Your tweets offer links to view pictures of your body parts.
9. You sent me an @ reply offering me a coupon for a product I just mentioned.
10. Your bio contains the word "motivational" in any context—speaker, quotes, training, etc.

Reasons why I may have stopped following you:

1. Your last tweet was four weeks ago and you're not on vacation or in traction.
2. You RT too many tweets trying to win contests.
3. You only tweet book promo.
4. You simply tweet too much for my taste.
5. Your tweets are consistently TMI about your sex life and/or medical procedures.
6. Your Follow Fridays fill my entire screen for twenty minutes at a time.
7. Too many LOLs when LOLs are not warranted.
8. We've followed each other for six months yet never found occasion to @ reply one another.
9. You retweeted one too many inspirational quotes.
10. ur lack of capitolization, punktation, speling + minamal attempts @ senetence structure + u use 2 many !!!!!s LOL!

Anyone else want to hop on the Twitter rantwagon?


  1. Anyone else want to hop on the Twitter rantwagon?

    Nope. I think you got it about covered. I know I write erotic romance but I don't want to know things about my fellow authors. Know or see.

  2. I automatically unfollow anyone with links to naked folks....even if the naked folks are hot, hunky, manly dudes. I have 2 kids who share my office space and it's awkward (to say the least) if I click on a link and my kids see hot naked guy. Uh oh.

    Also, anyone who is consistently negative, I unfollow. It's a downer.

    I find it hilarious that some erotica writers have naughty pictures of THEMSELVES on their websites. Holy Macarena.

  3. I also won't follow someone if every Tweet is their own link, and they never get into any @ reply conversations. Other than that, I follow back as long as someone is a real person and not a robot or spammer.

  4. Shoshanna, you're a sweeter tweeter than I! But I already knew that. I'm a curmudgeony old grumpy grandma-tweeter.

    Pen—I've heard stories about writers with naked pics of themselves on their sites, but I've yet to come across one myself. Clearly, I'm not clicking on enough links!

  5. Thanks for making me feel better. I thought I was the only one whe checked other people's profile for things like who the followed, number of follwers versus tweets and that sort of thing. I got a rash of religious followers, that were quickly blocked. I'm all for religion, but not preaching via twitter.

    And Meg - I haven't seen any of the Naked author pics yet, either.

  6. Donna—I've heard of people getting followed by the religious, um, enthusiasts… My reputation must have preceded me, as they've all steered clear of my followers list thus far! Clearly I'm a lost cause.